AZOTUSLAND chapter Fifty-Five

Jim locked up the Gallery and ran through the darkroom and slumped against the doors.

He chose door 2 and quickly slipped in.

He fell on the ground and started to cry. It came in waves and he felt like a drowning man as it washed over him. The voices and concerns and hearts and minds and the past and the present and the future.

He rose and walked to the bookshelves and mocked them.

"What FUCKING good are you!!!?"

He slung over to the bar and got a glass of wine and took his shirt off and hit the floor.

He thought about the dream the night before and the horse and the embrace of the old man and he cried out aloud "WHY!!!!!?"

He slumped and took up the remote and asked HAL for Rattle and Hum.

He fast-forwarded past Desire and others to Angel of Harlem...the song about Billie Holiday.

Such a beauty with such passion yet so ruined by the world.

God knows they got to you...Angel in Devil's shoes... Angel of Harlem

He sucked down the glass and poured another with self-malice.

Suddenly sadness filled the room. Light guitar and harmonica and the words sung by Bono...

Love rescue me
Come forth and speak to me
Raise me up
And don't let me fall
No man is my enemy
My own hands imprison me
Love rescue me

Many strangers have I met
On the road to my regret
Many lost who seek to find themselves in me
They ask me to reveal the
Very thoughts they would conceal
Love rescue me.

Jim heard a knock on the door. He knew who it was. It comforted him.

Always Maugham. What would Maugham do when he was gone?